I read Careerealism articles frequently, and this one stood out. Being a mom is a job. I am a leader of my homeschool. I’m the operations manager of my household. Everything would fall apart and not function if I weren’t here — can you relate? I have adapted the author‘s five points to a parenting situation.
How I can be the best mom
1. Always Strive For Peak Performance
I feel pressure when I think about the influence a mother has. It’s a HUGE responsibility. I know that my four children observe and learn from their parents. Kids are sponges. The good news is that their brains take years to develop fully and that they’ll live in my house for many years — so if I have sub-peak performance at some time, they may not have noticed, and I can make up for it in the coming years.
2. Leading Through Influence
There are characteristics that I want my kids to value as much as I do. Being a good example and talking about behavior in a concrete, kid-relevant way is one way to build influence. Talking is not difficult, but it costs time and effort.
My best solution: Talk while you’re in the car. There is some unexplained law that makes kids talk when they don’t have to look a parent in the eye.
3. Develop an Entrepreneurial Mind
The author is quite right here. She basically wrote a list of problem-solving skills: “No matter what you do, developing an innovative, creative, and visionary mindset is an asset. Assume some calculated risk and take some leaps.” Moms have to solve problems all the time. If it were possible to have a word meaning more than all, I would use that term here. The beautiful thing about this point is that you can develop it on the job. Fortunately, your kids, unlike employers and most clients, do not need to see your credentials and degrees before you begin working with them. In the long term, I think we get a paycheck once our work is “completed” and they move out (a parent never quits parenting) — seeing your child develop into a well-rounded adult who can live on his own must be a wonderful reward. Better than cash, right?
4. Tell Your Story
Long story short: My husband and his siblings didn’t know their grandfather’s first name until I asked his parents about ten years ago. I tried to start a family tree project over the weekend. After twenty years of marriage, I thought it was time to decorate the walls with a cool looking family tree, but dh doesn’t know the maiden names of his grandmothers. I’ll have to ask his parents again. Mr. TellBlast would like to know his story, but oral and written histories were never given or taken in his youth.
So now what? Take a photograph with yourself in it and display it. I don’t care if you aren’t your ideal weight or hair color. Make a scrapbook. Talk to your kids about why corn casserole is important to you at a family reunion, about your favorite color, and your first car, then ask them what foods are important to them, what their favorite colors are, and what kind of car they’d like to have. Moral of the story: Don’t be that nameless grandmother.
5. Be a Catalyst
I can read all the blogs, magazines, and books, and attend every parenting and special needs workshop and conference, and “pin” the night away, but unless I get cause things to happen, I’m going to be unhappy in my role as mother. You know the saying, “If mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Action point: Get out and perform the act of mothering for best results.
Every day is a new day. Go be a leader of your family and have a happy Mother’s Day!